Quenton Jack’s Birth Story
If you are new here, Quenton Jack is my THIRD baby in 4 years.
His oldest sister REIGN MARIE was born in 2019 at 40w3d with a very long, 24h marathon of back labor from start to finish, an epidural 18 hours in, and finally 2 hours of pushing.
His other big sister RYLIN MURPHY was born in 2021 ON HER DUE DATE. A very quick and intense 12 hours between first contracting and holding baby. I did request an epidural but it was JUST put in me when I rolled over and said I needed to push. She was out in 2 contractions of pushing.
You can click through those links to read their birth stories. Each one is so unique and the birth of my two girls could not have been more different. Now that you are caught up on my history, let’s get into the perfect details of how Quenton came into this world.
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We will start this birth story at my Week 38 appointment (which was at 37w4d) where the doctor told me I was about 3cm dilated and my cervix was soft. She predicted this baby would come earlier than his sisters and with how fast my second labor was she was basically like “Get ready for a sprint”. I pretty much expected to go into labor any day after that and made sure I was completely ready to have a baby.
(I should take this moment to talk about how much I LOVE AND ADORE my doctor. She was the same doctor who delivered my middle daughter Rylin and has been amazing every step of the way. She understands my lifestyle, my approach, and is so supportive and aligned with my low-intervention mindset. I always feel supported and encouraged by her and I truly feel it makes all the difference when birthing a baby.)
I made it another week which I was really happy about because of all the development that happens in those final weeks – especially in the lungs! I asked her to strip my membranes at this appointment (38w4d) and she did, warning me that with how much I had already progressed this would likely send me into labor.
It didn’t LOL.
BUT – from then on I was having what is called “prodromal labor” almost every single night. It would start around 9-10pm and go for a few hours until anywhere from 1-4am. On and off contractions that completely felt like the “real thing” but were just not getting stronger or closer together. It would keep me up most of the night and then eventually I would fall asleep as they stopped. Naturally EVERY SINGLE NIGHT I would think “this is it” and then I would wake up to my alarm still pregnant with no contractions.
9:00 am Wednesday, May 3rd
I made it ANOTHER whole week dealing with prodromal labor to my final scheduled appointment at 39w4d. I told her about the prodromal labor and asked her to sweep membranes again. When she checked me, she chuckled. “You are a clear 5cm, I am not sure how you are still even pregnant”. She mentioned that she could feel my water bag and asked if I wanted it broken. I declined. She was pretty positive that this membrane sweep would send me into labor right away and told me if I was at the hospital to have a baby later that day to make sure I had them call her as she was not the on-call doc that day.
I left the appointment, stopped to get a coffee hoping the caffeine would get things moving, and went right to a local park to curb walk. I was already feeling crampy from the sweep and figured if I stayed moving it would help things progress. It did! I walked for about 30 minutes and by the end, I was feeling regular contractions. They still were not getting stronger (yet) but we’re starting to get closer together. With all the prodromal labor I had up until that point, I still wasn’t very hopeful this was real. I headed home to get started on work for the day really hoping that I just needed to finish work today and have a baby by the evening!
Noon Wednesday
I was home, had eaten some breakfast, and was working on prepping my clients/sub coaches for me being out on maternity leave. Contractions were not stopping but they would start to slow down, get further apart, and be less intense anytime I sat or laid down for a long period of time. Because I this, I tried my best to stay moving. I went out on numerous walks up and down the block between client check-ins and sure enough, each time I did contractions would get stronger and more “real”. I was bouncing on the ball, using the breast pump, and doing any exercises I knew to help baby move down and into the optimal position to enter the birth canal.
2pm on Wednesday
By this point, I was pretty confident that we were having a baby today and this was no longer prodromal. I also knew the girls would be home from school around 4pm. Brenton and I talked through some scenarios and we decided that best case was I could continue to labor at home until we got them from school and were able to get our babysitter to come over for the night. I texted her around 2:30 to see if she was available and basically had her on “stand-by”. Once we made that plan, I was determined to stick with it. I knew (from past experience) this would likely mean we were in for a late night or early morning delivery with little to no sleep, and then a newborn on the other side of it all. So I decided I would go lay down and rest, maybe even nap for a few hours.
I was laying down for about 20 minutes and just about to doze off when I realized I hadn’t had ONE contraction the entire time I was laying down (I was using a phone app to track them). I was so annoyed. I got right back up and went back outside to walk the block again. Contractions started up as strong as could be as soon as I started walking, and I came to terms with the fact that I was going to have to stay moving until this baby was out. It was at this moment that I was incredibly grateful for the physical shape I was in, the strength and endurance training I had been able to maintain throughout my pregnancy, and the level of understanding and knowledge I have in regard to pelvic floor/core and how to use movement to best position my baby for birth.
4pm Wednesday
Brenton left to go get the girls and I made sure everything was ready to leave for the hospital at any time. I made sure there was dinner for the girls and contacted the babysitter letting her know tonight was the night and I would keep her posted as to what time we needed her. I didnt want to head to the hospital too early and spend hours there just laboring when I could be home with my babies. By this point, contractions were stopping me in my tracks and I was having to pause and intentionally breathe through them. I knew we were close but I was determined to make it until the girls came home and I absolutely KNEW the baby was very very close to birthing.
The girls came home and this is when it truly starts to get foggy. This is funny to me because I was CONVINCED I was still not that far along, but if you have ever been in labor you know that once things start to get foggy, you are a few hours away from a baby. Brenton had setup our indoor bounce house for the girls in the living room so that they would be self-occupied and not “bother” me too much. I vividly remember Reign jumping and yelling “mommy, mommy, mommy” and I wanted so badly to respond to her but I was mid-contraction (a very intense one) and I couldn’t respond. I could only focus on my breathing and getting through the really intense contraction. She came over held my hands and so sweetly looked right into my eyes and said “mom, remember you said when brother starts hurting you we will see him soon!” Little did she know in less than 3 hours, her little brother would be here!
5:15pm Wednesday
At this point, I got a text from the babysitter checking in on me and seeing if I had more insight on when we would need her. My response to her was “I’m going to try and make it until 630, I think I can!”. I really just LOVE the freedom and natural instinct laboring at home brings (I did this as long as I could with each of my births) and wanted to be with my girls for as long as possible knowing I would be away from them for at least 24 hours after this. I started folding laundry, cleaning up, putting clothes away – anything to stay moving – all while having pretty strong contractions that were stopping me in my tracks as I went through these tasks. Brenton asked what time I told the sitter and when I told him 6:30 he said “Are you sure? I would tell her to come ASAP”. He had seen this before from me and was starting to realize how close to birthing a baby I actually was before I even did. I then checked my app and saw my contractions had been about 3-4:00 apart and lasting for 1:00 for the last 20 minutes. With my 3rd baby in 4 years AND being unable to talk or walk through them – I thought I should probably get to a hospital. It finally hit me that we were CLOSE. Almost exactly 20 minutes after I had told the babysitter I was okay (about 5:35pm now) – I texted her back and said “Actually come at 6:00, I keep thinking it’s not big deal, but these contractions are REAL”.
6pm Wednesday
Our babysitter showed up at exactly 6 pm. We had food plated and ready for the girls, I gave them huge squeezes and big kisses and told them I was going to get baby brother here and bring him home to them. I still get emotional thinking about this because GOODNESS WHAT A RESPONSIBILITY right?! This point in labor is always “game time” for me. I completely understand the task ahead, the strength and mental toughness it’s going to take, all the risks and possibilities, but also all I am capable of and ALL THE REWARD at the other end. With each baby, I know more and more people are involved and invested in each “birth” and I just wanted to get baby brother here safely and smoothly for so many reasons – they were two of the biggest ones. They were so excited to meet their baby brother.
We were out the door shortly after 6pm.
HOSPITAL ARRIVAL (6:20 pm)
We got to the hospital and was put in triage right away for them to check me in and make sure labor was “real” and that I was progressing. I think my sense of calm and poise (again, after experiencing back labor, abdominal labor is a walk in the park!) was a bit confusing for them because Brenton had to tell the nurse multiple times “No, shes about to give birth VERY soon, is there a room ready, can we get her in a room?”. The nurse asked if I wanted an epidural and my response was something like “ehh, I’m okay now, I think I’ll continue to wait and see how I feel”. Her response was “You aren’t going to have time to do that, you may not even have time for it if we request it right now, do you want to try and get it done or not?”. I looked at Brenton a bit unsure and he said, with no hesitation, “You will be fine, you are so freaking tough and he’s going to come so fast. You won’t need it this time” He was right. I knew he was right, and all I needed was to hear it out loud. We went forward with no epidural.
The next thing that happened was she told me my doctor was not on call (remember, I knew this) and there was a different doctor who would deliver my baby. That doctor walked in and, not to sound like a cranky pregnant woman, but it was a male who I had never seen before and knew nothing about me. I was immediately uncomfortable by his bedside manner, and how he approached my husband and I. I looked at the nurse and said “Please call my doctor and let her know I am here. She will come for me, I know it.”. I did know it. She stripped my membranes earlier that morning and told me “If you go into labor tonight, I will be there for you.” The nurse was a bit taken back by my curt-ness, but listened to me (I asked about another 2-3 times after this lol) and called my doc to let me know she was here!
7pm Wednesday
From there, they hooked me up to a mobile fetal monitor and moved me to the low-intervention birthing room complete with devices to help move around, and even a nice big jacuzzi tub. I walked in and said “ohhh the tub would feel so nice right now, can I get in?!” The nurse kind of laughed at me and said “I will check you one more time, but I don’t think you will be able to. You are likely too close to birth.” She was right, I was somewhere between an 8-9 at this point and basically minutes away from birth! From here until my doctor came in, things blur in and out as they usually do at this final stage of labor. I was getting relief between contractions, but they were really intense and continuing to get closer together and I knew with each one I was closer and closer to meeting baby. If there was anyone else in the room (and im guessing there were some nurses around), I didn’t notice. All I remember at this point was Brenton and our communication back and forth – holding his hand, checking he was there, his encouragement, and his constant reminders to stay focused and that I was doing a great job. If you read all of my other birth stories, Brenton is an absolute ROCKSTAR support person during my births. He is calm and collected (at least on the outside) and always reminds me how tough and capable I am.
I then remember suddenly feeling the OVERWHELMING sensation of needing to push immediately. With Reign, this never happened because I had an epidural way before this point. With Rylin, I did recognize I had to push but it was immediately after they put the epidural in so I felt it at only about 80% of what I did this time. With Quenton it was so intense that I realized my body was basically going to push on the next contraction with or without my trying. My doctor still was not in the room yet, but the nurses ensured me she was on her way up to the room and if could make it through one more contraction she would be there to help me deliver. I was able to hold out on that contraction, and sure enough, my doctor came in ready to rock. I remember being so relieved and encouraged she was now there and I was READY to have this baby. It took two contractions of pushing, and Brenton pushing my upper back forward on the last one for better leverage, and out came Quenton in the most relieving moment there ever is in life – if you know, you know – at 7:20pm on May 3rd. Exactly three days before his due date and just 80 minutes after we left the house that evening. The texts Brenton sent to our family were just over an hour apart from “Were heading to the hospital” to “Baby is here!”. My goal of showing up to the hospital JUST to birth my son was accomplished and his birth was so incredibly fast and memorable, yet in some odd way – enjoyable and so so natural that it felt effortless.
The feeling of a fresh baby on my chest in that moment, is one of my FAVORITE feelings there are. Quenton calmed down immediately, cuddled up under me and all was right in the world. My son was here, the stress of labor was over, we were both healthy, and he was perfect. We birthed at an amazing hospital that values the uninterrupted Golden Hour (the first hour after birth shown to help bonding and postpartum adjustment for both momma and baby), so after they checked I was okay (no stitching required, no tearing, and no excessive bleeding) they dimmed the lights and left us alone for an hour. Perfection. Brenton propped up his iPad and we put on the NBA Playoffs and ate sandwiches. Our son arrived just in time to catch the last three quarters 7:30 pm Celtics game Dad REALLY wanted to watch. It’s like he knew.
If im being honest, writing this and reliving it makes me incredibly sad that this is the last baby I will birth. I LOVED my birth experience with Quenton and as I finish writing down this story (5 months after his birth) just like all my other kids, his birth story seems to be completely indicative of his personality. He is incredibly calm, patient, enjoyable, and low maintenance – the perfect baby boy who entered the world exactly the way his momma prayed for.
We LOVE YOU, Quenton Jack. This story is my gift to you, to us, so that we can relive this day and your journey earthside whenever we need to.
Happy Birthday Mr. Man!
NICOLE ROGGOW 